If you recently have broken up, have been single for some time now, could not find a partner to enjoy life with and among this, you suffer from depression. Then you should keep reading because this message is for you!
Some time ago I’ve found the book of Jordan Peterson and the message he spread to people, teenagers and young adults in general. And I’ve found the message he gives to people is quite interesting and works nicely on all kind of situations in life.
In his book “12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos” (which I’ll just mention for now) he encourage us to be responsible for our own condition in all situations.
The 12 rules are the following;
- Stand up straight with your shoulders back
- Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping
- Make friends with people who want the best for you
- Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today
- Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them
- Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
- Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient)
- Tell the truth – or, at least, don’t lie
- Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t
- Be precise in your speech
- Do not bother children when they are skateboarding
- Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street
From here, having all this information and putting it into practice in our lives we can experience a huge transformation on how we see the world. Knowing nonetheless, that is very difficult to do this while being depressed and anxious in life, that’s why you need to do an extra effort and doing this have much more value in your life!
But what all of this has to do with my love situation?
Fair question, bare with me, because I’m about to give you the best advice someone can give you when you have a broken-depressed heart.
#1 Advice To Depressed And Broken Hearts
The thing is that when you have your heart broken you’re giving your power away to that person who broke it, and this is normal because during this process you feel betrayed and that nobody is worthy of your trust, attention, and love.
But in a way, by keeping this mindset, you too are making yourself unworthy of trust, attention, and love.
The best advice to solve this is to keep on bettering yourself in all areas of your life. It sounds simple, and it really is simpler than you think. What makes it difficult is the grief of losing that one person, the anger of being betrayed by him or her and the blame we do on that person.
I don’t want to sound too hard with you guys, but someone needs to tell you this, you need to take more responsibility for your well-being and not expecting to find happiness on someone else being in our lives because this implies that we cannot find happiness by being alone.
Another reason why I think focusing on being better than your former self is the best advice, is because inside a relationship you must be able to give love (not just take love and discharge all your problems on the relationship) and to be able to do it in the best way, you must be in your optimal condition, meaning that at least you can manage your depression on your own.
The best way to recover faster from depression and break-ups is to focus more on what you can do to better yourself. Doing this will lead you to gain back your power to manage your emotions and deal with this situation better.
I believe this is the best advice anyone can give you during a hard time like a breakup. And with enough time you’ll build for yourself the resilience, self-confidence, and character to overcome all the bad things life will throw you.